Sunday, January 29, 2012

Zombies of Mass Destruction (2009)

   The usually quiet town of Port Gamble is believed to be the target of a terrorist attack.They suspect that known  Iraqi terrorist Mohammed Mustafa (Kevin Hamedani) has unleashed a virus turning the inhabitants of Port Gamble into ravenous zombies.Frida and gay couple Tom and Lance are the movie's main characters, but they don't meet until the end of the movie so you're basically following two stories until they finally meet up.
   Frida is an Iranian American Princeton student who's taking a break from the pressures of college and comes back to her hometown.Frida runs into her longtime schoolmate and neighbor, Brian Miller (Andrew Hyde),and his parents Joe (Russel Hodgkinson) and Judy Miller (Victoria Drake). Judy makes the mistake of thinking Frida is Iraqi, which is a mistake made by several different people throughout the movie.Frida later, against her dad's wishes, leaves to go on a date with her boyfriend Derek (Ryan Berett), (since when is sitting in a car smoking pot considered a date?). As they're sitting in his parked car talking Derek is attacked out of nowhere through his open window and gets his face ripped off in the process (I was sold right then!). Frida escapes the onslaught of bloodthirsty zombies surrounding the car and runs to her house to check on her father.She arrives to see that it would be nearly impossible to get into her house and is spotted by her neighbor, Judy Miller, who calls her over to the safety of her house.Just as they're about to make it safely into the Miller's home Judy is bitten.As Joe Miller is busy watching the news his son Brian tries to convince him that something has to be done about his now infected mother.Joe blows him off and Brian says "Mom's  bitten.Haven't you ever seen a zombie movie?". Joe yells back at him "You know I'm a vampire man!Now get your head back in the game for Christ's sake!". Joe notices that Frida is wearing a necklace similar to the one he's seeing on the suspected terrorist on t.v. and becomes convinced that she has something to do with it.Joe goes into a hilarious conspiracy theory rant and decides to put Frida through a barrage of patriotic testing.Among other things, he asks her the color of the U.S. passport and when she says "blue" he wants the exact shade.He makes her sing the National Anthem and claims she wasn't singing in the right key, so she must be a terrorist.Brian, by the way, has to remind his dad that he's actually Canadian.
   Tom (Doug Fahl) and Lance (Cooper Hopkins) are from Manhattan and are visiting Tom's hometown to come out of the closet to his mother Mrs. Hunt (Linda Jensen). They have no idea what is going on yet and are having dinner with Tom's mother when she mentions that she was bitten by one of her neighbors earlier.She starts coughing uncontrollably at the table and goes to the kitchen to get dessert ( I would have to pass on any food she was touching, that cough sounded nasty!). Lance tells Tom that he needs to stop putting off coming out to his mom and should get it out of the way right then.Tom yells from the dining room to his mom in the kitchen that he's gay.When his mom comes out of the kitchen and attacks him they think it's a reaction to the news he's just given her.After having to stake Mrs. Hunt to the wall they try to leave and discover there are more zombies outside.Mrs. Hunt eventually escapes and Tom would rather take his chances outside than have to kill his mom ( Screw that, she needs to be put down.She's pretty hideous, but then she really wasn't much more attractive before the transformation.).
    Zombies of Mass Destruction has it all!Good acting,decent plot,just the right amount of comedy,and my personal favorite...a hellacious amount of gore!There was blood,guts,and more blood and more guts.Who could ask for more?Lance finds a weed wacker on the street and creates a couple of the movies goriest scenes.The zombies were of the old school slow variety, but what they lacked in speed, they made up for in ugliness for sure.I really enjoyed this movie, I feel it deserves better than the 2.7 out of 5 stars it was given by Netflix.It's a 4.5 in gore alone!

1 comment:

  1. It's a good film. You can dl it at my site :)